When I was small, a family of close friends, my older sister, and myself created a club. It was called LA Jam. I don’t know what we were about, or the point of it even, and maybe I was just too young and even uncool to understand, but we had this really cool box. It got painted white, and maybe had a board inside for a seat and I think about 2 of us could fit in it at a time. And up until a few years ago I might have thought that was the only club I had been apart of, until I became pregnant with twins. All of a sudden I became aware of all of these “clubs” I am part of by no choice of my own, and I started wondering how many more I could really afford to join.
The first “club” I ever became a part of was the “middle child”, or you could even say “middle child syndrome”, club. I have two sisters, one older and one younger, and my whole life, since I can remember, I have been very aware of my situation. If you are not a middle child, then you might not understand the club status, but let me just say that any middle child who has struggled with the “syndrome” is very aware of their situation and welcomes the connection they make when they meet another middle kid. You can go almost anywhere and when you make that connection there is this strange instant bond that forms — sort of like when you meet someone of the same religion, or with redheads or gingers. I have bonded with all sorts of people over this fact, including one of my old bosses…
The second “club” I became a part of around kindergarten; it is called the “tall people” club, or more specifically in my case, the “tall girls” club. We bond over things like where to buy clothes and constantly being asked if we are and were volleyball players.
The third club I will admit I joined; I wasn’t so much born into it. You could call it the “female engineers” club. It isn’t as strong in it’s magnetic pull as the middle child or tall girls club, but there is often still a connection made when you meet other woman of your type. You can share stories on the 1 in 7, or 12 or 20 female/male ratio at your university; or bond over tears shed in the workplace bathroom when you daily interact in a primarily dominated male world.
And the last club I joined a year and a half ago. It is called the “twin moms” club.
(this seemed like a good spot for some photos!)
Mother’s in this club, at least in my experience, bond over knowing looks that pass back and forth. You can also spend time talking about your pregnancy, tips on parenting and acquiring 2 of many items mother’s of singletons only need one of, or the silly things people say about raising twins.
I sometimes wonder if life is made up of joining these unspoken clubs. If it somehow shapes us and provides a place of belonging or earthly identity. But then I also wonder if sometimes it is just me, perhaps thinking a little too deep or being a tad overly aware.
So how about you, do you belong to any clubs? And how would you define them?